My 9/11 Tribute

I wrote the following last night, as I reflected on the many emotions experienced by me and others I know on the tenth anniversary of 9/11/2001:

This day has been filled with love and laughter and the making of memories that will be cherished for a lifetime. This day marked the end of my husband's and my first weekend away from our son and our joyful reunion with him and other members of our family. This day has been a perfect fall day, great for the beginning of football season.

This day I have lived a life that was cut short for others ten years ago. I have made memories with my husband and son that others will not get to make with their loved ones this day.

Yes, I was deeply effected by 9/11/2001. I will never forget where I was or how I felt. Every detail of that day is etched into my memory, from the time my Mom called to check on me, right up to the time I fell asleep that night, after convincing myself the silence was a good thing. It meant I was safe. At least I had to believe that in order to sleep. We all lost something that day, and we are left with one day each year that means something different than it did 11 years ago.

We like round numbers in our society, and on this tenth anniversary of that atrocious, indelible day, I am celebrating life. No, I will never forget the horror, the fear, or the sadness. This day will always represent a turning point in my life. I am celebrating that life in honor of those who aren't here to celebrate; in honor of those who are still grieving for those they lost; and in honor of those who still shudder every time they hear the sound of a siren or another unrecognized loud noise. I am celebrating in honor of those who don't have the luxury of doing so, for whatever reason.

This day reminds me that I have a decade full of memories that others don't. I have a partner in life and a son, who is my joy. I knew neither of them ten years ago. There are countless families missing pieces of themselves, who were robbed of their joy and sense of security ten years ago. I can't restore that for them, and I cannot imagine what the last ten years have been like for them. But I can cherish my life as it is. I can be thankful for every moment I have with those I love.

The one thing I have to add today, 9/12/2011, is that I am reminded of the heart-wrenching reality that life always goes on. To me it is the most painful--albeit hopeful--realization of any loss. It may be forever altered, but life continues. Today I am still thinking of those who lost everything ten years ago. I wonder if the wounds of that painful realization were opened once again this morning as the sun shines, traffic jams, and people fall back into their normal routines. And I hope and pray for inner peace for those who have spent 1 decade and 1 day trying to find it again.